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Poem (March 1853) by Dewi Elfed Jones

Udgorn Seion, 1853 (Vol

Udgorn Seion, 1853 (Vol. 5):209-12

 

[p. 209]

 

SECTARIANISM ENSNARED

 

THE following verses were composed on some day in the Summer, when one of the chief Reverends of Glamorganshire was sent to Aberamman, to show the fanaticism of the Saints in believing and preaching the natural and personal government and reign of Christ and the Saints on the earth, together with the idea that the power and authority of God had been presented to the earth in these latter days,—who with a voice of thunder cried out that “all the claims of the Saints are foolishness, and that Papism, Mohammedanism, and paganism are all old wives tales; because the kingdom of heaven,” said he, “is within us.” Well, well, I said to myself, if I had a caravan, I would hire you to go throughout the cities, towns, villages, and all the public places of Great Britain, &c., to show the marvels of your mind: next to your size, all the high places of the world would be but miniscule: and with all this my poetic gift was stirred to come up with the following, to the tune, “Most Wonderful,” or some other tune, no matter which one. With amusing respect for the Reverend, who respects me, and who is respected by me, this Reverendish Exhibition is presented.

 

__________

 

ONE day in the Summer, with the people gathering,

Desirous of hearing some Rev. preach,

Somehow, in the middle of the excellent sermon,

Some remarkable and amusing words slipped out.

 

CHORUS.

 

On seeing something like this, who can blame the Mormon

For laughing ha, ha, ha! at the Reverends?

 

When he was in the middle of the great fervor and shouting,

He barely restrained himself from cursing and swearing;

When he saw some little Saint over there before him,

He raised up his mouth, and made an atrocious face.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

After clearing his throat, and realigning his distortions,

He gives a shout with an oath, “May the Saints be hanged;

I don’t want to see any of the Saints anywhere—

It’s the same as seeing the devil himself.”

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

[p. 210]

 

“The scourge of the world is in their neighborhood,

I am almost going crazy mentioning their teaching;

For what reason, you understand, are the illiterate Saints,

With their sermon destroying excellent wisdom?”

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

“The half-witted Saints are just an accursed pack,

The strength of their speech deceives our understanding;

The charm of their preaching, like a two-edged sword,

Killing all the powers of the most talented.”

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

“I feel their speech exhausting my conscience,

Though I do not confess the half of my tribulation;

I pray in secret and sincerely on my knees,

‘O, Lord, make it legal to kill all the Saints.’”

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

At this someone shouts in the crowd,

“Hi ho, hurly burly, the great fair of Gwylbarna;

The other day I heard the same manner of speaking,

When I was listening at the fair of the Priests.”

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

“Truth,” says he, “your fate is pitiful,

The world has been turned upside down;

Take my counsel, leave the old confusion,

The Saints indeed are in possession of the kingdom.”

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

“What kingdom is that? do you hear the weak-minded man?”

“What kingdom is that? silence, silence, and silence soon;

Listen, I reveal the kingdom of heaven—

It is true, though you call me a weak-minded man.”

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

“And, if you wish, call me also a devil,

Indeed, that is the kingdom seen by Daniel.”

“It is the same as saying that it is a rock with holes,

To say that the kingdom is in possession of the Saints.”

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

[p. 211]

 

“Leave aside your seething, your nonsense, and your tumult,

Don’t be so presumptuous as to doubt a preacher;

Talk like that is nothing but old nonsense,

For, the Kingdom of heaven, that is within us.”

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

Well, well, ha, ha, ha! that’s head shaking talk,

That the kingdom of heaven is all in your belly;

If that is true, you need not fear,

You can do some remarkable business with it.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

O hurry dear little one, it will be a funny sight

To see a preacher with a show in his stomach;

There is no reason to go to London, to the noise and confusion.

We can have a better Exhibition in the stomach of the preacher.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

New York in America, and the great city of London,

They are but a particle compared to the belly of the villain!

Hi, ho! come together, come one, come all,

To see the chief wonder of all creation.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

The first thing you will see next to the heart,

Coming to greet you, will be ten virgins;

Next to that, you will see an old woman,

Looking carefully for a piece of silver.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

If you turn your eyes to the south there,

You will see a number of nets fishing;

Over there, beside you, inside the donkeys,

You will see the sower planting along the fields.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

The place is very clear, you can’t mistake it,

The main road and the rocky place are plain to see;

If you pay attention, you can see the seeds descending

Among the thorns that are choking the sprouts.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

[p. 212]

 

You will see that the heat of the sun has dried up

The sprouts which were once green buds,

And the birds there came down to destroy;—

Is that not a very large expanse in his belly?

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

Look a little beyond the thorny place,

You will see the mustard growing splendidly;

The preacher will not need to obtain mustard to talk about,

As there is plenty of that growing in his stomach.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

(To be continued.)

 

Udgorn Seion, 1853 (Vol. 5):225-27

 

SECTARIANISM ENSNARED.

 

[Continued from page 212.]

 

THIS is very enjoyable place here, isn’t it, gentlemen?

Let’s go again to the room beyond the entrails;

And as you go past, you can see over the border

That valuable field where the treasure was found.

 

CHORUS.

 

On seeing something like this, who can blame the Mormon

For laughing ha, ha, ha! at the Reverends?

 

How precious is the sight, here are some pearls

In the belly of the reverend, what say the Saints?

It is too long to name, and is something remarkable,

To think that Christians have such a stomach!!

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

[p. 226]

 

O surprise of surprises, a truly remarkable sight,

That the reverend has such a huge belly,

That is full of everything imaginable;

What a wonder that he is able to take care of his stomach.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

In it the flour is treated in pecks,

In it there is plenty of wheat and darnel,

In it there are masters and servants in hosts,

In it there is planting and renting of vineyards.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

In it hiring-fairs are held,

In it there are feasts and days of marriage,

In it there are men shouting for wedding feasts;

And there are the hosts whom you see are the Saints.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

In it there is the buying and selling of some lands,

In it there are men dividing their herds of cattle;

In it there are also fig trees growing,

But there is not much virtue for figs to grow.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

In it the shepherd is in the confusion of the thicket,

Looking diligently for the lost sheep;

And after bringing it home all are cheerful,

And the shepherd has a full hundred grazing,

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

If you turn to the left hand you can see the builders,

And some are working quickly with all their energy;

Here there must be a good place to lay a foundation,

Because the belly is solid, you can believe.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

About a mile and a half beneath the chest area,

You can see some scoundrel of a prodigal son,

On the distant fields of the immense belly,

Among the prostitutes wasting his inheritance.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

[p. 227]

 

The stomach contains some huge seas,

And a host of merchants sailing bravely,

To gather treasures from far away lands;

Doesn’t the preacher have a savage belly?

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

Now, gentlemen, give me your listening ear,

Of all the marvels you shall have my explanation;

You will soon see, that a word to you is sufficient,

For the belly is the idol of all the Reverends.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

Peter the apostle gave us the portrayal,

That the sluggish stomach is the course of the market;

How remarkable, that such traffic as that,

Is to be found every minute in the cells of the belly.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

How remarkable it is to see the lively hawksters,

Wishing to kill all the Saints and deceive the people;

To the market of the stomach come trials and tribulation;

The preacher has a frightful belly.

On seeing something like this, &c.

 

With so much hypocrisy to attract men,

And obtaining the excess of all the baskets,

Paul the apostle when he saw their arrogance

Shouted loudly “their god is their stomach!”

On seeing something like this, who can blame the Mormon

For laughing ha, ha, ha! at the Reverends?

 

DEWI ELFED.

 

Immigrants:

Jones, David Bevan

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